family

All posts tagged family

Honestly Speaking

Published August 19, 2015 by Freedom Literature

I’m having one of the moments where I am staring at my computer trying to figure out what to write about. I want to write honestly about my life. I want to say the correct things, so it will be something that everyone will enjoy.

Lately I have been thinking about my financial troubles and how I wish I wouldn’t have to struggle so much in life just to have the things that I need or want. I am grateful for all that I have because at the end of the day I have a roof over my family’s head and food on the table and my family is in good health. So for the most part all things are good, but I just wish they were better. I know it’s human nature to never be satisfied with what we have and always want more, so needless to say I am only human.

I imagine myself living in a beautiful home where my kids have their own rooms. I imagine my husband with a job where he doesn’t have to kill himself and he enjoys doing. I imagine myself driving a Mercedes-Benz GLK, which is the SUV that I love the most right now. I want to be able to get my hair done when I want not when I can and my nails as well. These are just some of the things I imagine.

I don’t ask for much, I just want to be comfortable in life and not struggling. I guess this is just something I have to work towards making true. Maybe one day I will hit the lottery and all my dreams come true but until then I will continue to be grateful with all that the Lord has blessed me with.

Woman Crush Wednesday #WCW

Published November 20, 2013 by Freedom Literature
Thank You Mother

Thank You Mother

This #WCW I want to honor my Mother, Ada Ramirez. Every family is unique and crazy in its own way. My family has been through so much & some how we always find our way back to each other. I know its God – cause if it wasn’t for Him I don’t know where we would be.

My mother to me is a strong woman who loves with all the power she has. Who forgives without holding any resentment and did everything in her power & knowledge to give us the best life she could.

There is a saying in Spanish; “Hijo eres Padre seras, lo que un dia le hicistes a tus Padres eso mismo tus hijos haran.” Basically saying, “You are now a child but one day you will be a parent, what you did as child your children will do to you.”

There is no better way to explain to a child how hard & challenging it is to be a Parent. There is no handbook with all the answers on how to Parent. A lot of our parenting skills comes from how we were raised. I now, as a Mother, understand how strong my Mother had to be to get through all she went through and still be a loving Mother. I prize her for standing strong through the trials and I thank her for giving me all she could along with her LOVE.

 

 

Woman Crush Wednesday #WCW

Published November 6, 2013 by Freedom Literature
Woman Crush Wednesday #WCW

Woman Crush Wednesday #WCW

This Woman Crush Wednesday I am dedicating it too my niece Katiana Enid Rivera. The reason why I chose, who we kindly call, Katie, is because this young beautiful girl has overcome so much at such a young age. She is smart, career driven, hard worker, loving, loves God, family oriented and a sweet girl I’ve ever met. She is 17 and is extremely mature for her age. She is one strong puertorican beauty who I am proud to call my niece.

May God continue to bless and guide her in all she sets her heart on.

One of Many

Published October 24, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I apologize about yesterday, I haven’t been feeling well and was unable to write my story. This story in particular takes a lot of me to write about, emotionally. Hopefully this story will make up for both days. I apologize in advance for some foul language being used, its part of the story. I will try to tell you what I can remember. I feel like bits and pieces of this night I have suppressed because they are painful. I will try my best to put it together.

A fight broke out between my parents, really can’t remember why, they were yelling back and forth and I knew I was going to have to call the cops again. We lived in a 2-story townhouse, luckily every room, including the stairs, were rugged. If you have read my previous stories, you would know my father never fought with me, only with my mother and sister.

I remember my mother and sister were upstairs fighting with my dad. My dad wanted to lock himself in the room with my mother but my sister wouldn’t let him. I remember standing at the bottom of the stairs watching my dad grab my sister by the neck of her shirt screaming at her, telling her he was going to let her fall. My sister’s feet were barely touching the top of the staircase & she was struggling to grab on to the railing. My mother came out of the room to get my father off my sister, he let my sister go & luckily she was able to grab on to the railing. The next thing I saw was my father pushing my mother so hard she flew across the hallway into our room. At that point, I ran to the phone we had downstairs in the kitchen and I called the police. My father must have known I called the cops because he came down the stairs, but I had already hung up the phone.

I ran upstairs to check on my mother and sister, thank God nothing too serious, just some bruising, cuts and scrapes. Luckily those minor bruises, scrapes & scratches would heel but the memories would scar us for life.

We locked ourselves in my mother’s room and watched out the window waiting for the cops to come. We were so happy when we saw the cop car pull up our driveway, my dad didn’t share the same enthusiasm. We slowly came out of the room waiting for my dad to open the door, when we saw the cops came in the house we felt safe enough to walk down the stairs. We all walked into the kitchen and the cop started asking what was going on, my father stood right next to him, with no fear in his eyes and ready for another fight. My mother & sister were showing the cops the bruises, all I could say was, I was the one who called the cops. The cop tried to ignore my dad’s confrontational attitude at first, but the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The cop told my father to take a seat, my dad said “no”, the officer said, “Sir, I said to take a seat”, my dad said, “how are you going to come into my house and tell me to take fucking sear in my house, you sit the fuck down”. Both officers grabbed my dad and handcuffed him, they literally dragged my father all the way outside the house and into the police car.

There went my dad, another weekend, another night in jail, and another memory for us to never forget.

I thank God He saved us from worse. Although God allowed these situations to happen to us, I truly believe its all for His Glory. He knows what loads we can carry & never gives us more than we can bear. Along with the situations He allows in our lives, He also gives us the strength & the tools to deal with them.

I hope God blesses all the readers and touches lives beyond my reach. Lord I pray that whosoever is facing the same kind of turmoil, you hug them right now Lord and let them know its going to be okay, that they are going to be okay, that they are not alone & you are protecting them.

Cancer Journey

Published October 18, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I decided to end the week with a strong finish. Although this story is fast forwarding a lot from the previous stories, it is one of my favorites.

When I was diagnosed with Kidney Cancer I had no symptoms. All my urine cultures were clear, no back pain at all, no symptoms at all indicating something was wrong with my left kidney.

About mid September 2011 I started having shortness of breath and fatigue. I visited my primary care physician, which at that time was Dr. Konduru, to address theses symptoms. I have a history of chronic iron deficiency anemia. The doctor proceeded to get some blood work done to check my iron level. When the results were ready I was told to come in the office to discuss them with the doctor. The doctor stated my hemoglobin was at an 8, the normal is anywhere between 12-16. He asked if I was still having the same symptoms, I told him I was. Dr. Konduru recommended I go to the emergency room if my symptoms persist or worsen so I could have a blood transfusion done.

On September 26, 2011, I decided to go to Rex Hospital and have the blood transfusion since my symptoms were not getting any better. My shortness of breath was becoming worse, to the extent of not being able to carry on a conversation without having to gasp for air. The doctor on call at the emergency room ordered blood work to check if my levels where increasing. Fortunately, my levels had gone up from 8 to 8,6. The doctor came in the room, where my father, brother-in-law and close friend were with me, and stated since my levels were increasing, he wouldn’t recommend a blood transfusion. I asked the doctor, “how about the shortness of breath, its not getting  any better?” He stated, “we are going to have you walk up and down the hallway to check your oxygen level”. And so they did. I walked up and down the hallway with a nurse and became extremely fatigued causing my oxygen level to drop to 87.

At this point the doctor was concerned I had a PE (pulmonary embolism). They send me for x-rays and CT-scan of my lungs, luckily a PE was not detected, but in the CT-scan they went low enough to find a mass or something that looked like a mass in my kidney. The doctor said, “its an incidental finding and its probably nothing, just follow up with your primary care physician for further evaluation”. The doctor decided to have me stay at the hospital that night so I could have the blood transfusion.

A couple of weeks after that, I followed up with my primary care physician for further evaluation of my left kidney. He ordered I have a Urogram done, which is an in depth study of the kidneys. I had the procedure done that week and returned to Dr. Konduru the following day. The night before the follow up, I received a call from Landmark Urology, stating I had an appointment scheduled the following day after I see Dr. Konduru. After I received that message I knew something serious was happening. I went to see Dr. Konduru, I could tell by the expression on his face the results were not good ones. Dr. Konduru proceeded to tell me I had a tumor in my left kidney and it was pretty big. I asked if it was benign and he stated “make sure you do not miss the appointment with the urologist because they will be able to do a biopsy and proceed from there depending on the results”. 

I knew Dr. Konduru did not want to be the bearer of bad news, and I didn’t blame him. The following day I attended my appointment with the urologist, Dr. Daniel McCrakan. My father accompanied me because I needed the support just in case things went bad. Once Dr. McCrackan pulled up my imaging on the computer, he explained to us what everything was and showed us where the tumor was. The tumor was located inside my left kidney, the cancer had not spread, it was contained within the kidney. Than he turned in his chair and looked at my father and I, he said, “We need to start talking about surgery”. I was a little shocked at the rush on the topic, and I said “I thought I was going to have a biopsy first to indicate if its even cancer” I responded. The following words he spoke changed my life forever. He said “I’m 85% sure the tumor you have in your left kidney is cancer and we need to act fast to remove it because luckily it hasn’t spread as of yet.

I remember my dad crying trying to ask the doctor if I was going to be okay, but he couldn’t get the words out. I turned to Dr. McCrackan and he teary eyed as well. When you get news like this, its like having a bucket of iced water spilled over you. You don’t know how to react and it feels as though your mind, body & all of your senses are in slow motion trying to process all that’s been said. I’m thankful to God and everyday I give Him all the Glory & Honor for allowing the doctors to have found the cancer on time. This experience made me reflect on life and how I was living it. It made me realize what is really important in life and what I should be doing. Although this experience took a toll on my family, my friends and I, I’m thankful God allowed me to go through this wonderful experience because it opened my eyes to how much He loves me, has mercy over me, and how He has kept me through it all. For this and so much more I have to be thankful to God.

On November 18, 2011, I had my left kidney removed by Dr. McClure & Dr. McCrackan, who prayed with me before we entered the operating room. After the surgery the doctors spoke to my parents, who were in the waiting area with all my friends & the rest of my family, and told them I was blessed because the cancer was caught right on time. The tumor was almost as big as my kidney. The doctors informed my parents I had one more year to live before it would’ve killed me. But praise God for His mercy & grace, He allowed me to survive and here I am 2 years later Cancer Free!!!!

Burnt as a Child

Published October 17, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I hope everyone is enjoying the stories and you are also reminiscing about the times God saved you as well.

When I was about 4 or 5, my mother, my sister and I were living with our grandmother in Puerto Rico. My parents were separated, don’t know exactly why but you guys can only imagine.

My grandmother’s house was pretty old, probably one of first houses built in that area and most likely the last one still standing. The house didn’t have a water heater so we had to boil water and mix it with the cold to be able to shower. It was my turn for a shower, and from what I was told, I was a pretty hyper child ;). I can only imagine my little bald, skinny self running everywhere non-stop driving my mother crazy.

Eventually they got me in the bathroom. I don’t remember who was in the bathroom with me, it was either my mother or my grandmother. The pot of boiling water was placed on top of the toilet with the handle facing towards the outside. As I started to undress, I lifted my little dress over my head, and as my arm was coming down, I hit the handle causing the water to spill over the right side of my body. My sister tells me my skin rolled up like window shades and I was screaming on the top of my lungs. They called the ambulance and I was rushed to the hospital. My father came as soon as he heard what happened to me. When the time was almost up for the visitors, the nurse told my dad he had to leave. He refused and hid under my bed until the next morning ;). During the time I was in the hospital recovering, one of the procedures they had to do in order for me to heal, was place a cream over my burnt skin and once the cream dried up, they had to peal it off with a spatula like tool, which caused me to bleed. I don’t remember much of the details, only what I was told by my mother. Due to the severity of the burn there was a chance I could loose my right breast, but I thank God because they were able to save it and I healed just fine, like nothing had happened.

God is absolutely amazing. At times we feel everything bad is happening to us but we fail to realize things could be much worse. God NEVER gives us more than we can handle, know that to be true.

Hope you’re enjoying the stories, stay tuned for the next one. If you missed one, just click on the list of most recent posts and you will be able to enjoy them.

Mother Thank You

Published October 2, 2013 by Freedom Literature

Today has been a day that I’ve been going down memory lane, since I was a child. It’s been funny and at times heartbreaking. I believe we all have stories to tell about our childhood and some of us wish things would’ve been different, like the time I sat on ant hill and my mother had to spray me with the water hose in Puerto Rico.

As I wrote my memories down, I noticed a lot of them began with “my mother”. For example; “I remember when my mom would fill the house with water and soap in Puerto Rico and me & my sister would slide all over the house” or “I remember when me and my mother would skip all the way home and we found it so amusing”.

I just want to take this moment and thank my mother Ada Ramirez for all she did with all she could. For loving me, raising me, putting up with my mischievous ways, and loving me although I was bald for the majority of my childhood ;). Thank you mother for holding me at night when I woke up crying for no reason and for all your patience when I was little. I know now as a mother how much you gave of yourself to be there for me.

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