struggles

All posts tagged struggles

Honestly Speaking

Published August 19, 2015 by Freedom Literature

I’m having one of the moments where I am staring at my computer trying to figure out what to write about. I want to write honestly about my life. I want to say the correct things, so it will be something that everyone will enjoy.

Lately I have been thinking about my financial troubles and how I wish I wouldn’t have to struggle so much in life just to have the things that I need or want. I am grateful for all that I have because at the end of the day I have a roof over my family’s head and food on the table and my family is in good health. So for the most part all things are good, but I just wish they were better. I know it’s human nature to never be satisfied with what we have and always want more, so needless to say I am only human.

I imagine myself living in a beautiful home where my kids have their own rooms. I imagine my husband with a job where he doesn’t have to kill himself and he enjoys doing. I imagine myself driving a Mercedes-Benz GLK, which is the SUV that I love the most right now. I want to be able to get my hair done when I want not when I can and my nails as well. These are just some of the things I imagine.

I don’t ask for much, I just want to be comfortable in life and not struggling. I guess this is just something I have to work towards making true. Maybe one day I will hit the lottery and all my dreams come true but until then I will continue to be grateful with all that the Lord has blessed me with.

Throw Back Thursday #TBT

Published November 21, 2013 by Freedom Literature
The Bestest Friend Anyone Could Ever Ask For!

The Bestest Friend Anyone Could Ever Ask For!

This is a #TBT for me in the since that this girl and I go wayyyyy back. We have through so much together. She has never left my side, no matter how crazy, foolish, selfish, ignorant, annoying or drunk I was she always loved me through it all.

I just want to thank you for everything you have ever done and continue to do for me. I want to thank you for making me MJ’s Godmother, my honey boo boo, that I love with all my heart. I want to thank God for blessing me with your friendship and for giving you the patience, love and wisdom to help me along the way. I love you, never forget it.

 

One of Many

Published October 24, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I apologize about yesterday, I haven’t been feeling well and was unable to write my story. This story in particular takes a lot of me to write about, emotionally. Hopefully this story will make up for both days. I apologize in advance for some foul language being used, its part of the story. I will try to tell you what I can remember. I feel like bits and pieces of this night I have suppressed because they are painful. I will try my best to put it together.

A fight broke out between my parents, really can’t remember why, they were yelling back and forth and I knew I was going to have to call the cops again. We lived in a 2-story townhouse, luckily every room, including the stairs, were rugged. If you have read my previous stories, you would know my father never fought with me, only with my mother and sister.

I remember my mother and sister were upstairs fighting with my dad. My dad wanted to lock himself in the room with my mother but my sister wouldn’t let him. I remember standing at the bottom of the stairs watching my dad grab my sister by the neck of her shirt screaming at her, telling her he was going to let her fall. My sister’s feet were barely touching the top of the staircase & she was struggling to grab on to the railing. My mother came out of the room to get my father off my sister, he let my sister go & luckily she was able to grab on to the railing. The next thing I saw was my father pushing my mother so hard she flew across the hallway into our room. At that point, I ran to the phone we had downstairs in the kitchen and I called the police. My father must have known I called the cops because he came down the stairs, but I had already hung up the phone.

I ran upstairs to check on my mother and sister, thank God nothing too serious, just some bruising, cuts and scrapes. Luckily those minor bruises, scrapes & scratches would heel but the memories would scar us for life.

We locked ourselves in my mother’s room and watched out the window waiting for the cops to come. We were so happy when we saw the cop car pull up our driveway, my dad didn’t share the same enthusiasm. We slowly came out of the room waiting for my dad to open the door, when we saw the cops came in the house we felt safe enough to walk down the stairs. We all walked into the kitchen and the cop started asking what was going on, my father stood right next to him, with no fear in his eyes and ready for another fight. My mother & sister were showing the cops the bruises, all I could say was, I was the one who called the cops. The cop tried to ignore my dad’s confrontational attitude at first, but the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The cop told my father to take a seat, my dad said “no”, the officer said, “Sir, I said to take a seat”, my dad said, “how are you going to come into my house and tell me to take fucking sear in my house, you sit the fuck down”. Both officers grabbed my dad and handcuffed him, they literally dragged my father all the way outside the house and into the police car.

There went my dad, another weekend, another night in jail, and another memory for us to never forget.

I thank God He saved us from worse. Although God allowed these situations to happen to us, I truly believe its all for His Glory. He knows what loads we can carry & never gives us more than we can bear. Along with the situations He allows in our lives, He also gives us the strength & the tools to deal with them.

I hope God blesses all the readers and touches lives beyond my reach. Lord I pray that whosoever is facing the same kind of turmoil, you hug them right now Lord and let them know its going to be okay, that they are going to be okay, that they are not alone & you are protecting them.

I don’t think o…

Published September 2, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I don’t think of all the misery, but of all the beauty that still remains. – Anne Frank

I love the story of Anne Frank. A young girl who was faced with incredible obstacles in life, but somehow knew enough to focus on the good, the positive, the beauty that still remained in the midst of the chaos she was living in.

God tells us to be childlike not to act like children. If this young girl was able to see the beauty in all the misery, we should be able to do the same.  

I Trust You

Published August 23, 2013 by Freedom Literature

I can’t imagine my life without God. So many things have happened in the past couple of years that have been really tough times for my family and I. At times I do feel like Job and my faith is being tested. Through it all I have had my moments where all I want to do is disappear and be far away from all the chaos, but I know the God I serve and trust. I believe in Him and all that he does. For as hard as these moments have been, and continue to be, I know He will not leave my side. I know that in all God does there is a blessing on the way, there is Greatness as an end result. I await that day when I will be able to say I made it and I’m now a better person in God’s divine purpose.

I pray for his love everyday and for his mercy to be continuous with my family. I pray He covers us with His Holy presence and sends Angels to protect us from falling from His grace. There is nothing greater than learning to live by faith and trust Him to see you through it all.

 

Amen!!!

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